I tried to mask the calmness in my face while struggling with the chaos in my head. The daydreaming and the melancholy of fantasies, rehearsing every inch of the conversation over and over to figure out what might have gone wrong or what might not have gone wrong, is just so monotonous. Heavy head with sleepless nights and the bright daylight did not show any mercy on me, my so-called Ray-Ban felt like a counter fit, what was I thinking dragging myself out onto the roads; whereas I could have stayed at home in my bed and kept dwelling in self-pity?
The pitiless honking horns and the uncontrollable traffic were competing with turmoil in my head. In the midst of all this, I kept hearing you in my subconscious; the unique way you call me with the deep voice made me turn around several times only not to find you around. The chilled wintry evenings and the sky dappled with clouds made me take a still moment for myself on a lonely bench. The cool breeze brushing past, calmed my scaling heart. Your deep voice and warm thoughts ebbed out the winter chill. I plugged in my pods to the music player and played a perfect song to keep my thoughts in the channel and think only about you. It was the first time I was listening to this song with every next tune of music. The song’s tone brought more and more memories of you, along with a broad smile from ear to ear on my face. I sat there listening to the song on loop and thinking about you, reminiscing the joy of anticipation I feel when I am about to meet you and the moments we share together.
The winter gray sky was not gloomy anymore, but it felt like a trance with a promise of a starlit night. The dark hue came in unity with the night sky, and I was still sitting on the bench listening to the same song, wearing the same broad smile even when my cheeks hurt. I sat there conversing with you in my mental movie, feeling the tangible anticipations of being with you right at the moment until the eternity…!
“Every thought of you is constantly amazing; the longing for you is simply endless. It surprises me to think if you are also longing for me…!”